Saturday, December 29, 2007

Six Degrees to Oliver

Dearest Readers,
While my moms are busy boot-scooting the night away in Nashville, I have been at home taking care of my lovely grandfather, working on my crate-dragging endurance (I can make it all the way across the living room now!), and researching my namesake.  My moms must have known that a only a name with a noble and storied history would be appropriate for yours truly.  It is thought that the name "Oliver" comes from the Old French "Olivier" (a bit pretentious, if you ask me), or from the Scandinavian name "Olaf," meaning "ancestor" or "talisman."  More impressive than its etymology is the long list of Olivers that have come before me.  

No doubt you've heard of Oliver Cromwell, hero of the Commonwealth of England.  Cromwell's nickname as a soldier was "Old Ironsides," which is also the name of the most famous poem written by Oliver Wendell Holmes.  Holmes shares a middle name with Oliver Wendell Douglas, star of the critically acclaimed television series Green Acres.  Douglas bears a surprising resemblance to Oliver the Chimpanzee, who was commonly called a "humanzee" due to his surprisingly human-like bipedal stride and facial features.  The chimp is celebrated as a saint in the postmodern religion SubGenius, but is not the only Oliver with religious ties.  Oliver of Malmesbury was a Benedictine monk who built a pair of mechanical wings and attempted to reenact the myth of Deadalus.  Speaking of wings, Oliver North, star of the Iran-Contra scandal, appeared on several episodes of the sitcom Wings, playing himself.  

As you can see, I have many worthy role models to look up to.  When my moms bring back my camera, I'll post more pictures of myself in my Christmas finery.  Until then, I wish you all a happy new year!

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